Sep 02 – Revelers in El Salvador hurl fireballs at each other in a tradition marking the explosion of a volcano. Tara Cleary reports.

BERLIN (Reuters Life!) – To sweeten their first day at primary school German children are normally given a cardboard cone filled with sweets, but schoolchildren in Essen this year opened their cones to find pens which project erotic images.

BERLIN (Reuters) – For tourists tired of traditional sightseeing tours, one Berlin tour guide is offering something altogether different: a tour of Berlin’s public conveniences.

DAKAR (Reuters) – Senegalese security forces have arrested seven Koranic teachers for forcing children to panhandle, a police official said on Friday, days after the West African state announced a crack down on public begging.

BERLIN (Reuters) – A German company that fired a man for the theft of 1.8 euro cents (two U.S. cents) worth of electricity had no grounds for sacking him, a court ruled, dismissing the firm’s appeal against his reinstatement.

Blog Guy, I was interested in your recent post about music in Hell. You painted a nightmarish picture of nonstop accordions and bagpipes droning everywhere. Anyway, I have a question. Is there adequate parking in Hell, or do you have to spend all your time looking for a space?

“All your time” is a relative term in Hell. Taking a few centuries to find a good space isn’t going to inconvenience you in eternity, after all. Having said that, as you can see there is ample parking at most places.

Wait a minute. Who are those guys with long things in the background?

Huh? Oh, those are Swiss alphorns players. You didn’t think you’d be able to avoid the constant musical drone in Hell just by getting in your car, did you?

I’m sure at first you’ll end up running over a few alphorn players – everybody does -  but of course they just get right back up and start blowing again.

No! No! No! Look, I have to get away from it! What about flying?

Of course there are flights, silly! They’re as near as Alphorn Airport. Here’s a photo, on the right.

I must remain calm. Is it possible to travel in Hell in some manner where I DON’T need to listen to alphorns?

Why didn’t you just ask that in the first place? Sure, you can take the train.

Oh, thank you! Where do I go for that?

Just follow the sound to Oktoberfest Oompah Loudspeaker Station….

Join the Oddly Enough blog network

Follow this blog on Twitter at rbasler

Top: Alphorn maker Josef Stocker (3rd R) plays his alphorn with friends of the Alphorn Association Kriens on a public parking in the industrial area of Kriens, central Switzerland August 26, 2010. REUTERS/Michael Buholzer

Right: A spectator carries a Swiss Alpenhorn as he visits an Airbus A-380 aircraft after its first arrival at Zurich airport, January 20, 2010. REUTERS/Arnd Wiegmann

More stuff from Oddly Enough

AMSTERDAM (Reuters) – Police arrested an 82-year-old man after he bit and kicked officers who had arrived to mediate in a dispute with a neighbor over a domestic pet.

AMSTERDAM (Reuters) – The Dutch Finance Ministry Thursday acknowledged it was defrauded out of more than 160,000 euros ($204,800) earlier this year by an employee of the ministry unit that handles the state’s financing needs.

NEW YORK (Reuters) – Canadian parents are more lenient with their children than mothers and fathers in France and Italy, according to a new study.

Blog Guy, the last sign of the approaching Apocalypse you told us about was singer Justin Bieber publishing his memoirs, but I believe there was another one this week that you overlooked.

Those of us sitting out here waiting for the End of the World count on your blog for timely telltale signs.

Okay, okay. Yes, this week someone at an auction paid $14,740 for John Lennon’s toilet.

Taken together with Marilyn Monroe’s chest x-rays going for $45,000 in June, and the attempt in July to sell embalming tools used on Elvis Presley, these all constitute a definite sign.

These are indications our society no longer gets the difference between actual greatness and plain old personal objects.

Was this really Lennon’s toilet?

Yeah, he used it from 1969 to 1971.

He used it two whole years? What, did he get some bad egg salad?

No, I don’t mean he used it constantly, you dullard.

Is there any indication Lennon wrote anything while, you know, using this toilet?

I believe he was sitting on it when he wrote the “Beatles” song, “She Came in Through the Bathroom Window.”

I thought Paul McCartney wrote that.

Shut up and don’t spoil a good funny line. McCartney wrote it while he was using Lennon’s toilet, okay?

Anyways, Blog Guy, the news I was talking about this week was that Bristol Palin is going to be on “Dancing with the Stars.” Isn’t that an Apocalyptic sign?

Indeed it is. And if even one person watches Palin on “Dancing” while also reading Bieber’s memoirs during the commercial breaks, you won’t even have to bother showing up for work the next day. That’s a promise.

Join the Oddly Enough blog network

Follow this blog on Twitter at rbasler

More stuff from Oddly Enough